Four years ago I did away with the alarm clock. I had a new baby, afterall, and I had accepted at conception that my time would now revolve and center completely around him.
Nothing has changed.
And so this morning, without my literal biological alarm clock going off, I don't know what to do with myself. My two children are still sleeping, and I am wide awake (I should hope so, it's 9 AM) and I...I...don't know what to do with myself.
Several options have popped into my head. Should I eat breakfast? Without them? That's just weird. I could watch the news...turns out I'm sort of partial to "Sid the Science Kid". I could clean something...nah. Should I check on them? Are they still breathing? Don't they hear the birds chirping, the cats meowing (with quite a hint of a whine in it), don't they hear their dad in the kitchen making a terrible racket?
I love being a mom. Every once in awhile I get these strange, backwards glimpses of life before gestation, and it's unsettling. Like I missed that first step on the stairs.
So wake up already! Sheesh. You're freaking me out!
Kelly Out
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1 comment:
I am exactly the same way when Eden sleeps in. Often I'm like "wow, this is nice"...followed by a quick "unless she's not breathing". I'm always worried about that when I don't hear her.
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