Gratitude in the Midst of Sadness

I don't always like to blog about my spiritual experiences, or put them anywhere on the internet, because it's very hard to translate spiritual experiences into written word.

Especially to the public at large.

I also tend to not like to cast my pearls before the swine.  NOT THAT YOU'RE SWINE!  On the contrary, old friends, it is because I love you and trust you that I move forward with this post.

Today I'm sharing because...how do I put this...my testimony is burning in my chest so fiercely, and has been since yesterday.  The Spirit seems to be urging my thoughts to focus on an important lesson I'm supposed to learn.

I read a few articles yesterday about "feminism in the LDS church" and it disturbed me.  It hurt to hear that there were people being so hung up on the worldly things of the Church, and less concerned about the important things: Christ, sharing the gospel, and growing closer to our Heavenly Father.  

I'm not going to link to the articles because I don't want to propagate anything that was said.  There was nothing in them that was spirtually uplifting aside from ONE out of NINETY THREE comments.  The articles themselves were enough to make me cry.

Really, I cried.

(Brett reminded me that when the 3 Nephites asked to remain on Earth the remainder of it's days, that Jesus told them they would not suffer any pain, but for the sorrows of the world.  I understand that much more now than I ever did.)

And so I turned to the prophets voice.  I turned on conference and let the Spirit fill the void of hurt that was growing inside of me.

The Spirit reminded me of the Book of Mormon.  And that this blessed revelation was meant for our times.  

I could not have been reminded of that even more forcefully after today's devastating news.

During wars in the Book of Mormon we read about countless numbers of men being slaughtered.  Literally, they could  not count all the bodies.  We also read that even women and children were slaughtered.  Even children.

My heart aches and rejoices at the same time.  It's a weird, conflicting feeling, to be sure.  I'm so sad to know that our times are like those in the Book of Mormon.  That war is upon us.  Not just wars of nations, but wars on morality and goodness.  Wars against God and His people.  Even wars among His own people.

But I rejoice knowing that, like the times of the Book of Mormon, we have a living Prophet.  That we know the direction in which we need to head.  Lehi saw our times.  Saw all the wicked standing in a great and spacious building, laughing at those of us who stood firm in our testimonies and clung to the iron rod.  

I rejoice feeling the Spirit of comfort and knowledge.  Rejoice knowing that Heavenly Father hears our pleas, comforts us in our trials, and directs us when all the light in the world seems to have gone out.

I cannot imagine the sorrow of those who have lost their little children today.  Instead of planning for Christmas, they will be planning funerals.  

I am so grateful that the Lord has given me the gift of the Spirit.  Has comforted my aching heart.  I hope and pray He will do the same for all those families suffering.