Brett: I'll be home momentarily.
Kelly: Mk. Heads up. I am not responsible for anything Chloe may, or may not, have done while I'm 'resting my eyes' upstairs. The End.
Brett: Whoa whoa whoa. I'm not promising anything sight unseen!
Kelly: You don't have to sign anything. Just remember I was in labor with her for five months. I've done my share!
Brett: It only counts if you remember it. Clearly.
Kelly: I. Remember. EVERYTHING.
Brett: Well played.
Brought to you by parents who don't watch their children, who don't seal their cereal, and who don't want to clean up after said children.