A Whiney Post

Oh my freaking heck!  That's right, I'm Mormon and I say "Oh my freaking heck!".

Anyway, I finally coordinated a nap time, an actual nap time, where all my little monkey's are sleeping.  I'm so exhausted, I ran into a wall.  I'm officially a level 9 tired (10 being the walking dead).

So, I'm drifting off to sweet, sweet sleep when I hear, "Bang! Bang! Bang!" on the front door.  I know what it is.  It's the neighbor girl.  So...I ignore it.  Wipe the drool off my face and yawn, turn over and try to go back to sleep.  "Bang! Bang! Bang!" 

What tha...go away!

"BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG!" 

Just ignore it...just ignore it...

And then, "Can them come play!" being yelled in through my window.  Oh my freaking heck!  Just ignore it!!

"Can them come and play!!"

Are you FREAKING kidding me?

So I open the door, stomp my way to the front door, and surprisingly in a calm voice a little bit shaky with the insanity that's now leaking through, explain, "We are napping.  If we don't answer the door, you need to stop knocking.  Do NOT yell in our window." 

She just stands there.  "Go home."

SERIOUSLY?  Now I'm too awake to go back to sleep.  My heart is pounding, I'm livid.  And can I just say, if Brett complains even once today that he's tired, he's gonna lose a limb.  He got a three hour nap yesterday.   

Now give me some cheese with my whine. 

Kelly Off to Cry

It's Been...Interesting

I forget about some things that come along with beautiful newborns.

Okay, I didn't forget forget,  I was simply in placenta denial.  Anything would be better than having contractions every few minutes.

I am tuhiiiiiiiired.  My sweet angel with the sharp elbows wakes up every hour to eat.  And somehow I manage to be happy and smile every time.  She's got me wrapped around her long, skinny fingers.  I'm in love.  (Brett's OBSESSED, but that's an entirely separate post, I'm not even kidding.)

Cohen started Kindergarten today, pictures and complete emotional breakdown to follow.

Kembry is reacting...I don't want to say negatively, just...differently...since little tyke came home.  I'm going to try and be more positive and kind and loving with her.  Pray for me.  Pray hard. 

I haven't died.  I'm just simply in a I-haven't-slept-in-two-weeks-and-my-oldest-is-leaving-me coma.  I walk around with wet spots over my milk bags.  I just took my first shower in a week.  I don't remember what it's like to wear makeup.  But I'm perfectly happy. 

Ask me in another month and we'll see how perfectly "happy" I'll be then...

Kelly Off to Bed (for at least an hour...)

Dear Kimberly,

Once upon a bed rest, I googled "irritable uterus", and your hilarious blog popped up.

You made  me laugh, you made me cry, you became a beacon of sarcasm through the darkness of seriousness that was my life for 20 some odd weeks.

But now my sympathetic suffering has taken on a new meaning.  I've broken out in three different rashes.

Now, they're nothing like your horrible, weeping, wailing, disgusting (sorry) horror of a rash.  But seriously, three different rashes? 

How did you deal, sister?  We are bound by more than our angry baby bags now.  I itch with you, my friend.  I think of you with each satisfyingly painful scratch.  Give me guidance!

Love,

Me

Rough Night

And not because of the baby.  Entirely.

Brett decided he wasn't tired and played his guitar until 1:30 A.M. when I booted him out of the bedroom.

Then Chloe woke up every hour to eat.  Which is FABULOUS, considering the more she eats, the more she poops, the more bilirubin she gets out of her little system, the sooner I can smother her with my kisses and never put her down.

*Yawn*  But I am tuhiiiiiired this morning.  Morning?  Well, practically morning...at least for another half hour.  I wish I could abuse caffeine right now...smack it around a little bit...show it whose boss...

Anyone wanna go get me a fountain coke and three hundred donuts?

The kids, thank heavens, are blissfully playing out in the new sandbox my dear plays-his-guitar-at-all-hours-of-the-morning husband built for them.  Though, I'm not enjoying the bucket loads of sand I'm finding all over the house.  Anyone have any ideas how to avoid that little side effect?  Hose 'em down before they come in?  Sick the blower on 'em?  Vacuum them?  Everything is all grainy...

Kelly *YAWN* Out

Oweeeeeeee

I. Tore. My. Episiotomy.

Ouch.

Ice has never been a better friend to me.  And this is saying something after 7 years with a herniated disc.

It's going to take twice as long to heal.

But, the good news is, I got a way cute little baby out of it.  Now where did I put her?....

Placenta Brain

I totally love having three children.

Well, Chloe doesn't do much.  Mostly just lays in her tanning bed looking cute, squawking, smelling like a cute little baby and squirming.

But Cohen and Kembry absolutely melt my heart with all the kisses they give their new little sister.  How excited they are to show their friends.  How they always ask where she is, when is she going to wake up, can we hold her, pllllleeeeeasssse.

Yes, I love having three children.

And thanks to placenta brain, I may soon forget the pregnancy, and want a fourth...but let's make sure Chloe survives first.  And then we'll have to figure out a way to convince my uterus and Brett...probably a long way off.

Kelly Out

Princess: The Sequel

Having had a pregnancy with "complications" (stupid uterus), there were a lot of warnings thrown at us about "what could happen" if the ol' uterus kicked her out early.

And they had us properly scared.  For the most part, Chloe was one pampered fetus.

Even as I was pushing, my masked doctor was spouting out possible problems.

"She may only weigh in the 5 pound range."

"She may need oxygen."

"She may have problems regulating her temperature."

"She may be a democrat*."

I mean, I wanted to suck her back in...I was horrified.

But then I hear the gasp from three different people, and the "Whoa, she's huge!"

Weighing in at a whopping 6 pounds 13 ounces, and 20 inches, Chloe is our biggest baby yet.

But our biggest baby has jaundice.

So sad.

So, she's in Mexico gettin' a sweet tan while I sit and pine because I can't hold her every second of the day.

Poor baby.  (I mean me.)

Kelly Out

*Actually, even though Brett and I are not registered democrats, we have no problems with the ol' demo's.  We agree with a lot of their points of view, and think that a bi-partisan government is a big waste of time, energy, and resources.  Then again, Brett's a Libra and I literally can't make up my mind about anything...so...

Totally worth it.

Hail the Conquering Hero!

So...I totally had a baby last night!

Sweeeeet.

Chloe Susan
6 lb 13 oz
20 in
7:13 p.m.

Pictures to come...

Thanks for all your love and support and prayers and sarcasm, all of which without I would've been super miserable the last 20 weeks =)

Kelly OUT!

My Poor Baby

Not the girl, the other one.  The boy.

My kids are never sick.  Never, ever, never. 

On Wednesday, I had a wicked headache and a fever.  It passed by the next day.  The next day, Kembry had a fever and was throwing up.  It passed by the next day.

Today, I should've known, but how could I?  He never gets sick.

He didn't want to go to Primary.  That should've been my first clue.

He came home and slept for two hours.  That should've been my second clue.

He didn't want to play when we got to Papa's house.  I should've phoned in the ambulance at this point.  Instead, I gave him some drugs (the legal kind, calm down) and he seemed to be doing better. 

Until 7 o'clock tonight.  My poor baby had a 103.5 fever and a really bad headache.  And probably the worst mom in the world.  So we took him to the urgent care, and there doesn't seem to be anything wrong with him, aside from the severe fever and wicked headache.  How do you people do it?  Sick kids every other month?  Ear infections, runny noses, poopies, sore throats...I've been too spoiled.  Having a baby again might just put me into shock.

Amoxicillin, you had better fix my baby.  Or I'm coming after you, Yellowstone Mama Bear Style.

Kelly Out