Wednesday, November 11, 2009

My North is off

Four years ago I did away with the alarm clock.  I had a new baby, afterall, and I had accepted at conception that my time would now revolve and center completely around him.

Nothing has changed.

And so this morning, without my literal biological alarm clock going off, I don't know what to do with myself.  My two children are still sleeping, and I am wide awake (I should hope so, it's 9 AM) and I...I...don't know what to do with myself.

Several options have popped into my head.  Should I eat breakfast?  Without them?  That's just weird.  I could watch the news...turns out I'm sort of partial to "Sid the Science Kid".  I could clean something...nah.  Should I check on them?  Are they still breathing?  Don't they hear the birds chirping, the cats meowing (with quite a hint of a whine in it), don't they hear their dad in the kitchen making a terrible racket? 

I love being a mom.  Every once in awhile I get these strange, backwards glimpses of life before gestation, and it's unsettling.  Like I missed that first step on the stairs. 

So wake up already!  Sheesh.  You're freaking me out!

Kelly Out

1 comment:

Bethany Finlinson said...

I am exactly the same way when Eden sleeps in. Often I'm like "wow, this is nice"...followed by a quick "unless she's not breathing". I'm always worried about that when I don't hear her.

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