Are you ever afraid, that, like, you're going along thinking, "Lalalala, it's Wednesday, happy Wednesday." And then the next day you're thinking, "Lalalala, it's Thursdy, happy Thursday."
And then suddenly you stop in your tracks.
Is it Thursday?
I don't know, what day is it? Yesterday was Wednesday, right? No, wait, how would I know if I don't know what today is?
So you run over to the door where you practice days-of-the-week with your kids, which maybe you should stop doing because obviously you're no expert, and you look at the "Today Is..." and it says "Sunday" and you're like, "Whoa, it isn't Sunday is it?" Then you realize you're a crappy mom and haven't done days of the week with them in possibly 4 to 5 days...
So then you run over to your dry erase board calendar to make sure you haven't forgotten any important appointments, like, "Tuesday: Get induced" and you realize you haven't written ANY of your friggin' appointments down. Not that it would matter because you don't even know what days you've missed.
So you rush over to the t.v. because t.v. knows, like, everything, and hope that it will tell you what day of the week it is. You turn on the news. It tells you the time. 8:44 a.m. It tells you the temperature, 68 degrees. It tells you to start working out because you're fat and you're going to die. You turn off the t.v. How dare it insult you like that so early in the morning.
Then you realize you have about forty million other "date outlets", like your cell phone, if you could find it, or...do you hear the trumpets my friends...your computer. Your loving computer.
So, in case you didn't know. Today is Wednesday. July 14th. 2007.