My favorite website is down. Work is slow. It's morning, I'm hungry, and am desperately trying to lose weight. So you get to feel my wrath. You, my lone reader.

I was thinking this morning of our friend Joey. And my thoughts inevitably led me to the infamous "Ring" encounter, over 5 years ago, located at the Jordan Landing movie theater. After viewing one of the most horrifying movies EVER, the 7 or so girls decided to maraud down the empty hallways that 1 in the morning produced in the theater to the restroom. Me, being madly in love, decided to stay next to my stud and giggle some more, and let him hold me and protect me from any evil beings who may escape from movie screens. And besides, I only had "7 days" left with him anyway.

Well, the ladies miandered a little too long in the bathroom, allowing Joey plenty of time to think of, plan, and fulfill his evil doings. With that, he stuck his head in the silent, large, fully tiled bathroom and let out the most horrific yell I have ever heard in my LIFE. This was followed by a moment of dead silence, which was followed immidiately by reactive horrifying screams, which was followed by (my favorite) Melanie coming out of the bathroom with the look of pure hatred in her eyes, ready to behed Joey. Luckily for Joey, Melanie, along with all the other wounded females in the restroom, also had a playful side. And aside from grimmacing looks the rest of the evening, Joey was forgiven, and life went on.