Friday, July 11, 2008

Wanted: A New Hiding Place

I liked going to the movies alone. You know how sometimes you get so stressed and wigged out that you just want to lock yourself in the bathroom, turn on the shower, slump down and hide behind the toilet and cry yourself to sleep hugging the plunger? Well, sometimes the toilet is just too rancid to hide next to (at least at my house), and they've found my laundry room hiding place (no lock), so I decided the greatest place in the world to hide is a dark movie theater.

On one of these said occasions, before my hair started falling out, I decided to skip out and sneak off to my secret hideaway, the Megaplex Theater at Gateway. Crap, now I have to kill you. I'll get to that later, after the laundry. I'd say you're safe for about 6 years. Anyway, I went to a great movie this day called Hairspray. It's just this little unknown movie, so not really anyone was there. Well, I walked out singing and dancing, like I normally do, and decided what they Hay! I'm gonna go to another movie. I walked up to the ticket counter and said, "One ticket for Stardust my fine friend, and snap to it!"

"Aren't you the lady who just watched Hairspray?"
Stupid, observant ticket giver guy.
"That's awesome. I love going to movies all day too."
I took one look at his pale, pimpled, greasy face that would be the envy of any fast food french fry dipper, grabbed my ticket, watched the movie, and sneaked (snuck?) out the back way.

I haven't been to the movies alone since. This post is for that pimpled face, observant ticket giver guy who shamelessly ripped my dignity (what little was left) from me and stole my favorite secret sanctuary.
(Oh, and pimpled face ticket giver guy...sorry about the comparison to the french fry dipper. You're definitely one up on him in the world of retail.)
(Oh, and french fry dipper guy, thanks for the french fries. They were especially greasy last time, and you know how I love that.)


Wendy said...

Someone needs to introduce you to an e-ticket kiosk. It hides the shame quite effectively, I find. :)

Liz said...

Dont be ashamed! I do this too!

Lacie Moto said...

You crack me up! To hell with the greasy kid at the theater. You go back and you claim your hiding place!

Tanya said...

what the he--! call me next time. i will and am dying to come with you. lets plan our girls night(or me and you night rather) out! i totally missed this post last time i checked your blog.

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